Today I experienced the worst fear I have ever ever had. Like actual terror. Not just that little rush of adrenaline, or a fleeting moment, but actual terrifying fear that was almost paralyzing. Really. I cannot stress how really truly scary this was. Not fear of a concept, like terrorism, or fear that you or a loved on has cancer or some thing like that. Fear of something that is actual and real and totally scary.
This morning, I saw a monster. I went out to the garage to start the car to drive to work (That was my first problem. I really should not have driven to work. I should have taken the bus. I have been driving this week, because Ethan works until 1130pm, and needs to drive the car home at night since the buses don't run, but there is no parking when he comes in at 11am, so I drive it in at 6am, and he drives it home....but today, he is taking a taxi home, since I need the car to go to the live fantasy football draft this evening, so really, I had no business being in that garage.
Anyway. I went to the garage. I started the car, I walked back to the garage door, flipped the switch to unlock it, then saw some movement nearby. I jumped back, I whimpered, I did a terrified dance, I even yelled a bit. I have really never experienced such a fright. How on earth can someone get into the garage?? We have wonderful locks everywhere, my husband is a LOCKSMITH, his locks should be able to keep everyone and everything out of the privacy of our home. I guess good locks are not always enough. There, only three feet away from me, was an intruder. What do you do when you are in this situation?? What can you do?? You never know until you are in the situation.
For me, after the terrifying reality set on me, I backed up, and grabbed the best weapon I could see nearby.
A can of Raid.
It was not a very good weapon, since it was almost empty, and barely sprayed, but I sprayed it like pepper spray.
It didn't work very well. The massive, grapefruit-sized spider started moving CLOSER to me in it's panic about the Raid. This thing was huge. I have never in my life seen such an enormous spider. I cannot stress enough how massively huge this thing was. I have seen wolf spiders at Papas house, and they are scary with big hairy bodies and thick stubby legs. This was no wolf spider. This sucker was enormous. Huge scary body, and long, thick legs. Not a daddy-long legs. Tarantula sized, but without the muscular tarantula legs. They were thick, but not all hairly like those. Really big. REALLY.
The spider moved closer, and I whimpered and jumped back and freaked out. Then it moved back, over around the other side of the car. I was seriously considering going back inside and calling a taxi to get me to work, since it was too late to take a bus at this point. Somehow, I was able to get the door opened, and jumped into the car and backed it out onto the driveway. I could see the spider silhouetted in my headlights. A piece of me had been hoping I would run it over, although I was worried it would not die, and would somehow crawl up into the car and GET me. I didn't get it, though. In an act of sheer bravery, I grabbed the raid and sprayed the monster a bit more, then freaked out, dropped the can and slammed the door down and drove to work.
I may never go in the garage again. That monster could EAT my cats. Both of them. It was so seriously terrifying, I cannot even explain it.